Unrestricted freedom. It's almost a matter of consequences. You have the freedom to choose whether to brush your teeth or not...but if you choose not to you will get cavities and have to go to the dentist and it will be expensive...and on and on....
Responsibility....
without it ....
no freedom.
Rules do not curb freedom, they set the stage for freedom. Without them we cannot choose anything. In order to drive we have to follow the rules of the road...or we lose our right to drive.
With a child that is of "school age" certain things need to be learned. Now, it is our responsibility to make that work as attractive as possible and as easy a task as possible with supplying the child with the tools necessary to learn. But the option not to learn is not an option. The contract is not ridgid...if done right, it should reflect where the child is.....as children (beyond pre-school) we often don't know what is the best for us. That is why we have parents, teachers, etc.
I tell parents that freedom and chaos are two different things. If I had unrestricted freedom I would work in my art studio all day long and miss out on building relationships with people. Freedom to me is being able to choose for myself what is right as long as it does not cause others negative impact. A list/contract just keeps us focused on where we are and where we are going. I don't believe that beyond pre-school children know what is best for them at all times. They are old enough now to become influenced by society....tv.....peers....books.....experiences....
Montessori liberty does not mean we do what we want when we want to!
If you have an older child that chooses practical life activities all the time, that child is just staying comfortable and safe. New work to some children and people is uncomfortable. We need to make it as exciting as possible.
My son, who is now 28, was a real handful when we transitioned him from Montessori to middle school. The teachers kept at him to read Mark Twain's Tom Sawyer. We were called into the school office to have a conference. There was my husband, myself, my child, two teachers and the Principal. After the "he won't do what he is suppose to speech" I asked them if they asked my child why he didn't want to read the book. They said no...it doesn't matter he has to. I said to my child, "Why don't you want to read the book" and he said..." I read it twice when I was 6 years old, give me a test and I'll proove it".
When we got home, I sat my child down and we had a talk. I told him in a perfect world this situation would not have happened. In Montessori school it didn't....but in life as you get older it does. Sometimes you have to do the work to get to where you would rather be....so, let's go get Tom Sawyer and then we will get some books you want to read. The teachers will be happy and so will you.
Now later in life my son says...you taught me mom that sometimes you have to find out what the game is and the rules and then play it, so you can get on with your passion in life. This child's yearly income at 19 years old is more than I'll ever see." - Karen, Montessori Teacher
Karen offers Classes on various yahoogroups. She is incredibly experienced, informed and will answer any and all questions. Her classes are very very inexpensive and you also get manuals that are easy to follow, written, photos of the work, classmate support, and ideas on extensions. Her information is on the main page under Montessori Education http://peacefulmann.blogspot.com/
